Women Are Calling Out DJ Khaled For His Controversial Stance On Oral Sex
If you have an Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, or even a pair of working ears, you probably heard about his comments from a recently unearthed 2014 radio interview that made womankind collectively roll their eyes.
It came to my attention Saturday morning when it popped up in multiple group chats, and I knew it was something we needed to unpack. On The Breakfast Club with Charlamagne tha God, DJ Envy, and Angela Yee back in 2014, DJ Khaled opened up about his, erm, preferences in the bedroom.
The original interview is 16 minutes long, but if you’d like to skip ahead to the clip in question, start at around 7:45, where he begins with:
“If you hold it down for your woman, then the woman should praise...and the man should praise the Queen but you know...my way of praising is...how was dinner? You like the house you living in? You like all those clothes you're getting?”
So, to clarify, Angela Yee just goes for it, asking if he’s referring to “going down”, to which he emphatically assures us he does NOT. Over...and over...and over again.
When asked if it would be okay if the tables were turned and his wife refused oral sex on him, he says simply, “Nah, that’s not ok, ‘cause I’m the don, I’m the king,” because “there might be some things that y’all might not wanna do or wanna do, but it gotta get done...I just can’t do what you want me to do.”
The whole conversation gave me an overall icky feeling. I think it’s not so much the preferences that bother me, because hey, that’s between you and your wife, and every relationship is different, but the way that he said it, and the sense of entitlement that really shone through. It represents the aspect of relationships that I think lots of women are afraid of and even more women are sort of complicit to - inequality.
Aside from this interview being sensational and ridiculous and kind of funny, it really is worrisome. When a guy as influential as DJ Khaled tries to act like these “different rules for men,” are totally normal, it gives off the idea that they get out of pleasing their ladies because they financially provide for them.
It also perpetuates this idea that going down on a man is expected, but returning the favor to a woman is a chore. It’s a toxic mindset and something young women will start to believe if they aren’t confident enough to ask for what they want in bed. A tale as old as time, but still one that’s troubling to see nonetheless.
Moral of the story - sex should feel good. That’s it. You wanna go down on your partner? Have at it. You want someone to go down on you? Say so, you deserve it. Sex should be a safe, fun, and positive experience, and no one should make you feel like you owe them sexual favors in exchange for their support - or literally anything else.